Peace Offering Backfires! White House Not Amused by Cambridge Police's Gift of Colt 45 and Ripple.

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Peace Offering Backfires!

White House Not Amused by Cambridge Police's Gift of Colt 45 and Ripple.

 

 

 

Police,

 

 

 

Washington, DC  (BNSE): The Controversy surrounding President Obama's comments toward the Cambridge Massachusetts Police Department, in regards to their arrest of Harvard professor Henry Louse Gates, Jr., continued to escalate today.  According to Cambridge Police, they were attempting to send a "peace offering" in preparation for the "meeting over a beer" between the President, Gates, and arresting police officer, James Crowely, when they sent the White House a case of Colt 45 malt liquor, and Ripple red wine.

"Racist?  Hell yeah, we think it's racist," chided a senior Administration official.  "They're treating the President of the United States like he's an extra from 'Sanford and Son!'"  The official bolstered his racism accusation by revealing the gift of fortified wine and beer also include a "care package" containing several pieces of watermelon, a black eyed pea and collard green salad, several packets of Kool Aide, and a box of King Edward Blunts Cigars.

Cambridge Police were quick to offer apologies to the President.  "This is not racist in any way whatsoever!  Hundreds of police departments across the country would have done the exact same thing.  We honestly thought he would like it," stated on Police authority who wished not to be identified.   "What the hell do these people want anyhow?"  Others were less frustrated, saying, "This is, yet again, another teachable moment.  Despite our best efforts, we inadvertently offended a man whom we forgot was half white." 

For the record, White House officials confirmed President Obama's beer of choice is Bud Light, however, he does, on occasion enjoy several other domestic micro-brews.  The officials were eager to set this issue aside and "move on in a positive direction in this matter."  However, the Colt 45 and Ripple will not be served in the White House.  Additionally, while Heineken, Bud Light, and Sam Adams were the planned beers for the event, the White House is making arrangements to have a ready supply of Milwaukee's Best and Pabst Blue Ribbon on hand, "if it would make the police feel more comfortable around colored folk."


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